Yoseiph, the Dreamer

• NETZARIM RECONSTRUCTION OF THE HEBREW MATIYTAHU, Text Chapter 2:13: When the messengers ^1.20.1 who had requested Yehôshua had returned,^2.13.0 look… a messenger ^1.20.1 of ה' ^1.22.1 appeared to Yôseiph in a dream saying, “Having arisen, take the little boy and his mother and flee into Mitzrayim;^2.13.1 and stay there until I speak to you.  For Herod the Great ^2.1.2 is impending to request ^7.7.1 that the little boy be killed.  Having arisen, Yôseiph took the little boy and his mother by night, and retired into Mitzrayim (and remained there until the end of Herod the Great)^2.1.2 in order that it would be fulfilled ^5.17.3 that which was spoken ^2.15.0 by ה' through Hôsheia ha-Nâvi ^11.9.1 11:1 saying, “Out of Mitzrayim I called My son.”^2.15.1

This passage should ring some bells. Who else do you know whose name is Yoseiph, who is known for his dreams (I counted four instances), and who wound up in Mitzrayim (pop. English: Egypt)? Yoseiph Ben Ya'acov, of course. Coincidence? You're dreaming.—Yosi

 

Yoseiph: The Hidden Tzadiq

• NETZARIM RECONSTRUCTION OF THE HEBREW MATIYTAHU, Text 1:18: Yoseiph, her betrothed man,^1.18.4 was a tzadiq.^1.19.1

In most English translations of the Xtian text, "Joseph" is referred to as a "just man," which is nice but does not quite convey the richness of the Hebrew tzadiq. 

Paqid Yirmeyahu refers to one set of meanings in his notes (NHM 1:19.1): the tzadiq is a righteous man who is generous to the poor. Gifts to those in need are referred to as tzedeqah, which puts such generosity in the context of  "justice" rather than "charity."

Paqid Yirmeyahu refers to another meaning in the glossary item for tzadiq (See "T" in www.netzarim.co.il. Attached to a name, it refers to the leader of a particular Torah community. This is a common practice among the kharedim and has been adopted by the Netzarim. Thus, the first paqid after the death of Ribi Yehoshua was Yaaqov ha-Tzadiq while the current paqid is Yirmeyahu  ha-Tzadiq. 

In Xtian tradition, Jxsus is preternaturally bright and learned, no thanks to either "Mary" or "Joseph" who are portrayed in Xtian literature as poor folk who are baffled by his learning. Joseph, who is understood to be a minor character, is portrayed literally as carpenter, an uneducated man who makes a living with his hands. However, if the more authentic Yoseiph was a tzadiq, in either sense of the word, he most certainly played a role in what young Yehoshua knew and how he learned it. The idea that Yoseiph might have been the titular head of a Torah community is tantalizing. It makes Yehoshua's emergence much more understandable. — Yosi

Try Some Kosher Karbonara.

Recipe Adaptation: One of my favorite pre-Torah dishes was Spaghetti Carbonara, which traditionally includes both pork bacon and cheese. Obviously, that doesn't work in my new life, but it can be adapted to the kosher kitchen.

To do so, you first need to understand what's involved with a traditional carbonara. I've heard two explanations for the name, carbonara. The first is that the Italian for "carbon" is a reference to the coal-mining community that was fond of the dish. The second is that the word refers to the coal-like bits of coarse black pepper that are more or less essential. The steps to make traditional carbonara as I learned them.

1. Saute bacon, onions, a bit of onion in wine. I did this slowly.
2. Cook spaghetti. Other pastas will work.
3. Once spaghetti is cooked, transfer it to a dish containing a mix of a beaten egg or two and some parmesan cheese. Mix. The spaghetti will cook the egg mixture.
4. To serve, garnish with bacon and onion mix, more parmesan cheese.
5. Season to taste with coarse black pepper.

To come up with a suitable kosher version, you need to honor the basics of carbonara, to wit: Smokey flavor (easy), pasta cooked with egg (easy), coarse pepper (easy), cheese (a little tricky for meat version). Try these adaptations:

• Meat: Instead of pork bacon, substitute kosher Beef-Frye, summer sausage, Italian sausage, or ground beef or turkey and add the "smoky" flavor with kosher Liquid Smoke. For oil, you can use chicken fat or vegetable oil. Instead of cheese, use parve bread crumbs. This is not as much of a compromise as it may seem. Bread crumbs are commonly used instead of cheese in pasta in some parts of Italy, but you should add them after you mix the pasta with the egg. Don't forget the coarse black pepper.
• Dairy: Instead of pork bacon, substitute a parve ground "sausage" like Gimme Lean combined with Liquid Smoke or smoked salmon.. For oil in your saute, you can use butter, parve margarine (yuk!), or vegetable oil. After that, assuming you can find kosher parmesan or a good substitute, it's just like the traditional carbonara
• Bonus Tip: Instead of Liquid Smoke, you can sprinkle on some parve Baco-Bits to get that smoky flavor.

--Schueller House.

Tabouleh: The Flexible Food

The parsley-intense version: I didn't like my first encounter with tabouleh because it was mostly bulghur wheat and tasted more healthy than good. Then I discovered a version that was heavy on the parsley and light on bulghur. Much better in my book. More of a refreshing salad. Tabouleh has an added benefit. Because it's parve and cold, I can use it anytime--even as a potluck dish if I'm socializing in a non-kosher home and want something I can eat. I don't use a precise recipe for this. Tabouleh basically consists of parsley and bulghur as the main ingredients; scallions, tomatoes, and mint as the grace notes; and olive oil and lemon or lime as a dressing. You can also add other elements, notably cucumbers. I like it at least three parts parsley to one part of bulghur. Curly parsley works better than Italian parsley for this dish. Make sure you wash it well and inspect for insects--and use a kosher bulghur like Red Mill.

The DaVinci Code: A Jewish Perspective

It's a blockbuster: The only way to finally overcome Christianity, after 2,000 years of consistent failure, is by exposing the anti-Torâh Yësh"u as a counterfeit of the pro-Torâh original: historical Ribi Yәhoshua!

Think about it … the original, historical Ribi Yәhoshua, because he advocated Torâh before Paul's Hellenist apostasy, will lead Christians out of their post-135 C.E. Roman idolatry to Torâh – and the fulfillment of Zәkharyâh 14.16-21 (which is already beginning) and related prophecies.

Surprisingly, a free online book from Jews for Judaism does just that. It's DaVinci Code: A Jewish Perspective by Rabbi Michael Skobac. Except for his use of the common name J*sus to refer to the historical Ribi Yehoshua, the relevant sections might as well have been written by the Netzarim. It's a beaut. You can see the relevant parts by going to the Netzarim website and following the "Jews" link on the home page or you can go to Jews for Judaism website to view and printout the whole book (It's short.) Schueller House.

Shopping Tips: Kosher Bread

It ain't easy: I enjoy shopping for Kosher food. Finding an OU or a Triangle-K on a packaged product in supermarket is akin for me to finding a diamond in a forest. Kosher foods are not especially hard to find, though it can be daunting to locate some items. Bread, for one. Even if you are easing into kashrut, buying kosher bread is important because the kosher stamp guarantees that the bread contains no dairy ingredients, which are commonly added to breads in the U.S. The exception, of course, is bread that is certified kosher-dairy, a rarity that we have seen in one brand of Jewish rye and in Sun-Maid Raisin Bread. I may have an easier time than most, living as I do in an area served by King Sooper's, whose store-brand breads are often kosher. Especially welcome are their hot dog and hamburger buns, which are hard to find in kosher versions and in demand because the one kosher meat available almost everywhere is the hot dog. In addition, we stumbled across Baker's Inn breads, which are certified kosher, widely available, and higher end than you would expect to find in the Wonder Bread store where we first found them. If you can't find regular loaves of kosher bread, look for specialty breads that have kosher certification. I have run across bagels, pita, and tortillas that are certified kosher. (And I just realized I'm not sure whether these all constitute bread for ritual purposes, especially the tortillas. Something to ask the rabbi.) And of course, you can use matzot if you can't find anything else. Egg matzot for Shabbat. Schueller House

Ken's Kosher Kitchen: Dunking the Dishes

On the day before Yom Kippur: I went to Prospect Lake near the house, said the requisite blessing, and immersed my dishes, pots and pans, and utensils. I did this several times, once for each group of utensils. This was the final step in making my kitchen kosher-functional. Even though I don't have much in the way of utensils, I didn't have enough boxes to hold everything and so made several trips. I had intended to use a nearby creek as my mikvah, but an online search showed some misgivings about immersing in a creek. This had something to do with the creek not being available for immersing women because of snowmelt. Or something. In any case, I chose the lake and am glad I did. The water, at the time, was relatively warm and adequately deep water was just a few steps from shore. Now it's winter, and I will have to wait until late Spring to add to my collection of useable utensils. Schueller House.

Back to Kashering

A Watched Pot Never Boils: I decided to re-kasher my utensils because I wasn't satisfied that I had kashered my large boiling pot well enough I added some bricks to the pot so that it would boil over and then, on another day, rekashered everything. Other than waiting for the darn thing to boil again, it went well and quickly enough. (I don't have a lot of stuff yet.) Now it's on to the "mikvah." Schueller House.

Netzarim Website Is Back Up.

Get War Updates: We've received many inquiries worried that the Netzarim website was down. Concurrent with the Hezbollah attack on Israel, Israeli ISPs, including the one serving the Netzarim, were hacked by anti-Israeli, anti-Jewish elements. The site is back up, with the Netzarim blog especially worth visiting for updates on the war. Schueller House.

Ken's Kosher Kitchen: Immersing Utensils

Immersion Options: I sent this query to Paqid Yirmeyahu of the Netzarim. "Since geirim N^etzârim are not Y^ehudim (Jews), does the requirement to take their dishes to a miqvëh) apply? In my reading, the purpose of dunking dishes and utensils is to prepare them for use by Jews. So since we aren't…"

His first reponse: "The purpose of complying with kashrut is [a] to comply with Halâkhâh and [b] enable you to host Y^ehudim (even though they may still not trust your compliance with kashrut, decline to eat with you out of bigotry or may simply not be geographically proximate. It's part of qualifying your practice to meet community standards. Because of its centrality to all functions in the community, kashrut is one of the least flexible mitzwot."

He sent an additional comment later:"In my experience, there are some locations (notoriously, for example, south Florida and Tampa) where chauvinist Orthodox communities intransigently refuse to allow outsiders – even undisputed Orthodox Jews (much less Conservative or Reform) – to use their miqwëh. If that happens to you, realize that you're not the only one. While they should be helping and encouraging learners, don't allow their myopic arrogance to daunt, discourage or dissuade you because there are halakhically-acceptable alternatives: natural bodies of water such as seas, lakes, rivers and streams (but not bathtubs, swimming pools or the like).

"Some useful guidelines are found at:
www.torah.org/advanced/weekly-halacha/5757/matos.html

"You'll need at least a couple of feet of water, since each utensil must be placed in the water individually and allowed to drop free and untouched by anything but the water for several seconds. Then remove the utensil from the water and set it aside. After all of the utensils have been immersed, recite the b^erâkhâh once for all of them." (Paqid Yirmeyahu, Ra'anana, Israel )

For more information, see the Netzarim website.

Ken's Kosher Kitchen: Herbs and Spices

Insect Patrol: I've been buying herbs and spices for my kitchen. Slowly. Spices tend to be expensive, at least when you buy them from the Supermarket. Added to that, I have to find certified kosher spices. I hadn't thought of this. I mean, what could herbs and spices have wrong with them? The short answer, as far as I know, is "bugs." If you're trying to keep kosher, you're not supposed to eat non-kosher insects. Yep, theoretically at least, there are kosher bugs. And what's the deal with honey, a substance that comes from the inside of bee, which can not only be kosher but is traditionally eaten on yom t'ruah (rosh ha-shanah)? Anyway, bugs are a big deal. When a rabbi is inspecting seemingly innocuous kernels of corn for canning, he is not looking for stray pork rinds so much as infestations of creeping things. If you grew up in the sweet corn belt like I did, you'll have to admit that the good rabbi's job might not be as easy at it sounds. Anyway, I'm reading that there are assorted procedures for inspecting garden veggies and de-infesting the infested. To be honest, this news was most disconcerting to this gardener. For now, while I contemplate changes in my veggie hygiene, I'm buying spice bottles with Circle U on them. Schueller House.

Ken's Kosher Kitchen: A Blue Dishpan

One More Piece to the Puzzle: Yesterday, I bought a blue dishpan. Because I have a new stainless steel sink and have only introduced dairy items to the kitchen, I probably could wash my dishes right in the sink. However, having a separate dishpan for dairy is a must once I add a meat section to my kitchen. I had my eyes peeled for a blue dishpan--blue is the usual kitchen indicator for "dairy"--so when I saw one at Ace Hardware, I jumped on it. When the time comes, I'll get a red dishpan for washing my "meat" dishes and maybe a green one for "parve" things. Schueller House

Ken's Kosher Kitchen: Meat vs. Dairy

The Decision: I decided to focus first on putting together a dairy kitchen. I noticed that advisers often recommend that newcomers begin their march to kosher by keeping their meat and dairy dishes separate and worrying about kashering, immersing their utensils in a mikvah, and other issues later. This was good to read because it implied that the rabbis--or whomever--understand that you have to start from ground zero and raise your level of kosher gradually. You start with practice. Well, I've done that by developing a habit of separating my meat and dairy meals. However, I have a different problem than a unified household. With two kitchens now in use, I need to make sure I don't contaminate the kosher kitchen--or the dishes and utensils from the kosher kitchen--with things from upstairs. This will be easier, I figure, if I don't have to worry about mixing my dairy and meat things--or getting the parve items mixed with either. Keep it simple. This business is filled with practical decisions like that. Schueller House

Ken's Kosher Kitchen: The Utensils

Trying Not to Go to Pot: Once the kitchen was built, I had to get utensils. Okay, I started ahead of time. Or at least tried to. When I first moved to Colorado Springs, in anticipation of setting up a kitchen, I started acquiring utensils, used ones mainly to save money. Did I mention that this effort cost a few dollars? Anyway, I had to toss about half of what I acquired because they can't be kashered. So there went the ceramic plates, the ceramic bowls, the non-stick teflon cooking pans, everything plastic, everything wood. Some of those materials might work when they are new, as long as they never get contaminated. I'm still looking into that. Trying to find decent cookware wasn't easy, still isn't easy, especially used. Aluminum cookware is easy to find, but I don't like it. I've always been suspicious that the aluminum isn't stable and will work its way into my brain, addling me before my time. So far, I've settled for stainless steel with copper bottoms. Kind of okay. I like cast iron, but I believe there are differing opinions on whether it can be kashered. If so, I'll have to buy my skillets new, season them myself, and keep them from becoming contaminated. One good thing: The kitchen is out of the way, unlikely to be used by anyone without my supervision, so keeping items from being contaminated should be reasonably easy. Schueller House.

Building the Kitchen

Ken's Kosher Kitchen: It took me months just to get the basic kitchen together. First, there was the design. The main problem was trying to figure out where to put the basics, especially the sink and the stove. Then there was the technical issue of how to get wastewater out of the basement. I resolved that, eventually, by getting an under-the-sink pump, but I didn't know what steps to take. Did I have the plumber over to do rough-in plumbing before putting the cabinet in? No, but I had to communicate with the plumber to make sure I located the sink in a reasonable place. We had found a charming 20-inch used gas stove, and we were expecting the plumber to install a gas hookup. However, a friendly kitchen designer warned me off of putting a gas stove in the basement. Too much hassle, with venting and safety issues. Did I tell you that none of this is code? Kitchens are not allowed in basements here. Anyway, I got the plumber in to do his piece and searched for an electric stove. We found one and then had to get an electrician in to install a 220 outlet and some other electrical frou-frou. In the meantime, I had added another countertop and set a small refrigerator underneath. None of this had too much to do with kosher, except the stove and the refrigerator were used and so required cleaning. However, I did design the kitchen somewhat symmetrically, so it would be easier to separate meat and dairy (and parve, oh my) utensils from each other. The whole thing probably cost a couple thousand dollars by the time all was said and done. What (or, more accurately, who) pushed me was Carole, somewhat to my surprise. She approached it as a project that needed to get done. Whatever the reason, I was grateful for the push. For a guy who is not exactly Mr. Handyman, getting this far was a miracle. Schueller House

Ken's Kosher Kitchen: The Deal

One Bedroom, Two Kitchens: My wife and I are not on the same page, religion wise. I'm trying to follow Torah, she's trying to follow the Gospel. While I was attending services at Congregation Am Echad in San Jose, California, she was up the road at St. Martin's Parish. Boy, don't try this at home. When we had the opportunity to move to Colorado Springs, Colorado, where there was no Orthodox minyan that I could pray with, I made a deal. I'll move away from this vibrant Jewish community only if you let me set up a kosher kitchen somewhere in the house. The assumption was that it would in addition to her kitchen. She agreed. And while it has taken a while for me to get underway, I have to say she has lived up to her end of the bargain. Schueller House.

Ken's Kosher Kitchen Adventure

More to Come: I'll use this day, the fifth day of Omer, the day before the seventh day of Khag Ha-Matzot, to disclose that I've been trying to set up a kosher kitchen for some time and that I will be sharing the process with your in this blog. Check back here for regular updates. Schueller House.

BODYWORLDS2 vs. The Circus Freak Show

Is There a Difference? BODYWORLDS2, now exhibiting at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science, displays human bodies, preserved through a process called Plastination in various and unusual poses. There is a stunning lack of criticism for an exhibit that is morally disgusting. While the exhibit is touted as educational, the same visual imagery could have been accomplished without resorting to using human bodies. It is probably true that the use of human bodies attracts more visitors and therefore more "education," but education in what? In the sensationalizing of human remains? In turning the Denver Museum of Nature and Science, and other exhibitors, into direct descendants of the circus freak show? In Jewish tradition, by the way, bodies are generally not viewed, the practice being considered disrespectful to a person who is best remembered in his or living form. Schueller House.

Do The Seven Laws Permit Civil Unions?

Take the "Sex" Out of It: Rabbi Yirmeyahu Bindman, in The Seven Colors of the Rainbow: Torah Ethics for Non-Jews, notes that the Seven Laws of Noah forbid homosexual behavior as they do incest, adultery, bestiality, and some other sexual practices. Moreover, "no one can legislate any change to permit them." No surprise there. But there is a question of whether one should support anti-sodomy laws, which generally are not going to be enforceable or even desirable as a symbol in a country which doesn't cotton to telling consenting adults how to live their private lives. On the other hand, it seems to us that much of the impetus for protecting "gay rights" verges over into a desire for some societal endorsement of a specific sexual behavior. To be sure, there are some practical issues at work. Why should someone be denied the right to designate another person as their primary visitor to their hospital bed? Why shouldn't they be able to designate the person of their choice as their beneficiary or to share property with that person? Why shouldn't they be able to form a household with that person? Of course, currently they can make such arrangements through various mechanisms. But domestic partnership legislation would make it easier. And we have no objection, as long as such legislation doesn't define the nature of the relationship in sexual terms. Why should my barber, who has pooled his money and credit with his twin so that the two of them can each buy a home, be prohibited from forming a legal domestic partnership with that twin? It seems like the same issues apply--except for the need to have their relationship somehow endorsed by the state. Why is endorsement of particular sexual practice (beyond, possibly, marriage between opposite-sex couples) the job of the state? Think about how weird the extension of such a principle could get. We think that taking the "sex" out of the domestic partnership question is a compromise that solves a number of problems.
Schueller House.

The Shabby Chic of the Shabbos Goy

A Dilemma You Will Face: If you're a non-Jew, self-described "Noahide" or otherwise, you will likely be faced with the prospect of functioning as a "shabbos goy." Basically, this refers to a non-Jew who does for a Jew what he or she can't do on shabbat. For example, the lights might go off in the synagogue. Or the air conditioning. This is a dicey proposition, for the Jew as well as for you. First, Jews are not supposed to ask. What they might want is for you to realize that there is a problem and to get up and turn the light on yourself, which you probably shouldn't do (certainly in some situations, I would argue) but for which you would unlikely to be criticized (because that would be a violation of derekh aretz or politeness). If you are reluctant to get up and turn on the light without being asked, you might find yourself on the listening end of an odd conversation, in which a member of the congregation appears to be hinting without asking directly for you to turn the lights back on (or hinting without hinting, since hinting itself may be forbidden). Depending on where you are with your practice, you may to be happy to get up and flip on the light. Or, as in my case, you will not act as a shabbos goy (both because as a Netzarim geir, I forbidden from doing so, and because I don't think it honors the Jewish house to do something that is forbidden on shabbat). Even if you've decided that you cannot act as shabbos goy, it is not quite so simple (it is never simple). In some situations, it may be in order to do something that a Jew cannot do or would prefer not to do. For example, in San Jose, a young boy injured himself playing during the service and needed to go to the hospital for stitches. Certainly, the father could have taken him, this being a situation of pikuah nephesh (for life), However, I was more than happy to drive the father and the son to the hospital and open the car door for the father (which turned a light on), saving him the necessity of violating those normal shabbat prohibitions. Another time, I volunteered to push an elderly holocaust survivor in a wheelchair to the beit k'nesset, which would also have violated some rabbinic prohibitions. However, this was pikuah nephesh as well, the man needing to be with his community rather than at home alone on shabbat. Despite my silly headline, this is serious matter, worth thinking about before it comes up, and consulting with your rabbi (who will likely honor your decision but help you sort out any complications). I'm not clear on the source of this Shabbos Goy article (a Word file), but it does point to classic sources. Schueller House.